mental health — How I Manifested my Very Own Beach House

Do you meditate?

Many women I talk with about this say no because they can’t stay with it. They want to meditate, they may even start a practice, but then it goes awry.

I find this interesting. Like most things that are valuable to incorporate into our life, it may take some effort and trail and error until we find our way.

This is how it was for me with meditation.

I have wanted to have a consistent practice for years. Basically ever since I became a yoga teacher in 2001. But I just couldn’t find the practice I wanted to stay with and I couldn’t be consistent. It seemed the minute something happened in my daily routine that would throw me off, I’d let it go.

I knew that if I stayed with meditation long enough it would become a habit (just like anything else we do) and I would begin to reap the benefits like more focus and concentration, less reactivity (respond rather than react), better listening skills, less tension and anxiety, and so much more.

This was the reason Chris and I made the December 2024 healthy habit meditation! It’s the best practice you can do for your overall health & wellbeing.

So how did I become more consistent?

I joined a group. After trying apps and other options I knew, I realized I needed a little more accountability. I meet with them each morning on zoom for a 20 minute practice. At first I just liked having somewhere to be, rather than practicing alone. But over time, I found that the energy of the group held me and helped me look forward to my practice. Even when I can’t meet with them, I have a recording, or I do it on my own.

And now I can say that I have a daily (OK almost daily) 20 minute practice that really helps me be a better human!

How am I a better human?

I have more patience / I am a better listener / I am not as reactive / My digestion is better / My stress levels are down / and the best part is I can see and catch my own crazy tendencies and redirect myself quickly.

You know what I mean? The parts of us that are judgy or angry or afraid. Living in this chaotic world can be challenging, and it kicks off our protective tendencies that we all have.

But here’s the thing - that doesn’t make us a better human. It only makes us reactive and blaming the world for our feelings.

So if you would like to be less reactive and more responsive in the world, try meditating for even 3-5 minutes each day. You will be surprised at how easy it is once you say YES.

*Meditate anywhere you feel stable and grounded*

What meditation to do?

Before we answer that, lets start with a couple simple pointers.

First sit in a comfortable position, like your favorite chair. No you don’t have to sit like a yogi, just sit so your back is supported and you feel grounded.

Next, be in a quiet space. This helps especially when you are first starting. Somewhere you won’t be disturbed is ideal.

Then, set your timer, close your eyes and breath. That’s it.

Jon Kabat-Zinn says don’t try to stop your mind from it’s thoughts - you can’t achieve this. And if you try, all you’ll get is a big headache! All we can do is watch the thoughts come and go. At first it’s like a crazy monkey mind, but over time, you’ll notice the thoughts are less and not as jumpy.

This is where we create the calm stable mind that everyone wants!

I personally like an anchor to come back to when I get distracted with my thoughts. The easiest way is to watch the breath come and go through the nostrils or feel it in the body. I like a mantra that I say in my mind. Anyway you can find to keep coming back to the present moment works.

If you’re saying to yourself - I can’t meditate, I never could. I’m going to challenge you’re giving up too soon. Nobody is good at anything when they first try. Learning to play an instrument, learning a new language, learning how to use chopsticks! You get the point.

And if you really feel challenged and can’t be consistent, join a group like I did.

Give yourself the gift of daily meditation. Try different approaches until you find what works for you - then do more of that. You will become a better human - I promise!

My journey with gut and mental health started years ago.

At the time, I didn’t realize what was happening. I developed IBS back in the early 90’s and was immediately treated with medication, which helped but…..

I then developed depression. Basing it on the fact I had a difficult relationship and moved away from friends and work I loved, I agreed to antidepressants which helped, but….

I would later again develop gut related stress symptoms, that made me look at what types of food I was eating. I chose to eliminate the common foods that can cause gut issues like gluten, dairy, corn, eggs, and legumes. It helped but…..

My gut and my brain were experiencing stress related symptoms, as I was living a very stressful life. The gut and brain are related. When our gut isn’t functioning optimally, our brain experiences symptoms like depression and anxiety (which are on the rise). Treating our gut or mental health without looking at the other doesn’t make sense.

It wasn’t until I learned that my daily choices and lifestyle were at the root cause of my diseases.

Dr Casey Means, author of Good Energy states: Hoards of scientific studies have suggested that diet and gut health have a profound impact on our mental health outcomes through the “gut-brain axis” as well as by the way in which our gut lining can protect our bodies from system-wide inflammation that can then trigger symptoms in the brain.

Some of the symptoms that are related to gut/brain imbalances are

Depression & Anxiety
Chronic Fatigue & Brain Fog
All Digestive Symptoms
Chronic pain anywhere in the body
Sleep disturbances

These symptoms are rapidly becoming “normal” in our society, but they are far from normal! They are common which is different and most people do what I did - they take medication to fix their symptoms without looking under the hood as to why they have them in the first place.

For me it was not realizing how I pushed myself daily, didn’t deal with my stressful situations, and kept moving at 100 miles an hour each day, falling into bed exhausted, and doing it all again the next day.

The body can’t handle it and over time it will start showing symptoms. Especially when we move toward perimenopause time.

So what to do?

First, look at your daily choices and the way you live your life. Are you taking quiet time each day for meditation or contemplation or prayer? Are you eating clean whole nutritious foods regularly? Do you rest when you are tired?

Then spend more time doing what you love. Women have been taught to do for others and put themselves last, but for true vibrant health, especially during perimenopause and beyond, the opposite is true. Like when you fly and the airline steward tells you to put your oxygen mask on first before helping others.

At the heart of all dis-ease and imbalances is our daily choices. What time we go to bed, what we watch on TV, who we spend time with, and what and how we eat all have an impact on our health.

Sometimes it’s hard to see our own crazy. Sometimes we need support. If you have someone, go talk with them. If not, you can talk with me. I have experience personally with this issue AND I have education to help others.

I work through the lens of Ayurveda and Yoga, but I also have a background in health and wellness. There are things you can do right away to subside or even eliminate your symptoms.

You CAN have a happy, healthy, vibrant life!

How Meditation helps me (and you) be a Better Human

The link between gut health and mental health - it's REAL!